Waiting

We find ourselves waiting a lot these days. Less than a week ago was procedure day! In two weeks we take a test to see if the procedure worked. That's 14 days of waiting. 14 long days! On our calendar we have a big "test day" written and circled. These days of waiting are filled with joy, hope, fear, nervousness and anxiety...oh and some relaxation. Test day is scary. We want so bad for it to bring joy and hope and all those other emotions that would go along with finally having news that we have dreamed of. Yesterday afternoon we were washed in a deep layer of fear. Today we're ignoring it all! The day before that we were filled with hope. These emotions don't just come and go by the day, but sometimes by the hour, minute, second. We really do try to stay focused on the positive. And we pray a lot, more like beg God a lot. We know that we are in need of his grace that is so deep beyond a depth we could ever know. Mayo already has a plan for if the procedure worked or if it doesn't. I like that about them. What I don't like it thinking about it not working...because we've never wanted anything more.

There is another thing we are waiting for...first call regional assignment comes in less than 3 weeks...February 23. This waiting is filled with a drama we didn't see coming. I won't go into a lot of detail here but in what should be filled with happiness, anxiousness, and excitement is instead bathed in a layer of anger and fear. We beg God here also...please God, any region but region...I won't fill in the blank. I don't want to offend anyone. But the drama makes me really mad. Don't worry, we know we have to deal with it between the time span of now and assignment night! We have even started dealing with it by seeking the wise counsel of the associate dean of students on campus and the head of the contextual leadership office...we will even probably talk to a counselor they recommended. Why? Because there is one tiny part of the globe that we've been getting emails from regarding an opening, that we do not want to go to. We should not be getting these emails...they are against the rules, and they make us mad! We beg God, please don't send us there. And we beg him even louder to give us peace. To send us where he wants us, and to get our hearts ready to embrace where that might be!