Jan. 6

Last Thursday was Day 1...ok that might be TMI (too much information) but hey that's what this blog it all about! We always wait for Day 1's...when we're not doing fertility treatments they can be devastating, but when a treatment looms, they are just what we've been waiting for...

I called the doctor that afternoon. I had to leave a message on her nurse's voicemail. Of course, because I've said it before, this made me nervous. I always think the worst...like they won't remember me or it won't be as easy as I was expecting. Within 2 hours Jackie called me back. When we were down there in October for our appointment Jackie came in briefly to meet us, so we would know who we were talking to if we needed questions answered and the doctor was not available. Jackie was so kind.

What I found out, that I did not realize, was that our preliminary IVF cycle visit had to be done on either day 6-9 of my cycle. Whew, it's probably a blessing that I didn't know that stipulation prior to calling, it would have given me one more thing to fret over!

It just so happens that day 9 falls on Jan. 6, Friday, Joel's day off, no preschool day...timing, I love it.

At 1pm we will have our appointment. They will run infectious disease tests, do a trial retrieval to make sure that when it comes time to retrieve eggs from me everything goes smoothly, we'll go over and sign consent forms...and probably a lot more that I cannot remember.

It's one of those journeys where you simply cannot take in every detail until you live it. And even then, well, we'll probably have a lot of processing to do.

As we were driving from Helena to Great Falls and then on to Big Sandy yesterday, back from a trip to visit Joel's family and some friends, we were slightly overwhelmed that we have to go back down the same road on Thursday...but we'll put on our rock star hats and go for it, over the mountains and through the woods!

I'm sure Friday morning will be one of those silent because we're both very nervous mornings. We might even cry at the appointment, or be overwhelmed beyond knowing how to handle ourselves. But we know we will have the strength to take every step and to make every decision, one because Jesus will be carrying us, no doubt, and two because kindness will oozes over us and flow freely.

We will feel safe and we will let joy enter in, triumphing over fear. We can do this. We are about to do this. Terrifying joy fills us.

It's a journey we couldn't be more ready for. Bring it!