The K confesssion

Wondering what the K stands for?  Yep, you guessed it...

I watch Keeping up with the Kardashians.  It's pretty fascinating.

The Sunday before last was the season finale...

Part one of the season finale was the week before.  On it I watched as Kloe made her first trip to a fertility clinic.  Kim went with her...

On Part 2 Sunday night I cried...a lot.  Khloe saw the fertility doctor more and we watched as she and Lamar dealt with that...while also watching Kourtney give birth to her little girl.

When I head Khloe say something along the lines of, "maybe I will be the one sister who never has babies..." I cried...in the midst of infertility, I said that many times.

When she said something about it being her fault...well, I cried.  I can't count the number of times either Joel or I said those words throughout our journey...we never ever once blamed the other person, we sometimes blamed ourselves.  That's when the other person really talked us through it...

It wasn't our fault.  It was simply the pain filled tear filled way that God decided to write our story.

I cried as I watched because I remember the pain.  I cried because we have miracles growing. 

Sleeping

For 5 nights I did not sleep.  It was miserable. 

On the 5th night, at 1am, I had a major meltdown.  This wasn't fair, it was oh so hard on me, and what was it doing to the babies?  I sobbed for a long time. 

I was exhausted.  But the second I laid down to sleep my legs became restless...

Blasted restless legs.  Anyone ever deal with that?  Pre-pregnancy I did.  But I was trying everything that worked then...stretching, taking 1 tylenol, leg massages...

And nothing was working.  I even took the 2 valerian roots that usually help me sleep and it didn't help.

It felt torturous.  It felt awful.  And by the 5th night I was scared what it was doing to me. 

I added this to my list of things to talk to the doctor about at our appt yesterday...

As soon as I said I couldn't sleep and the words "restless legs" he knew....

I have a magnesium deficiency.  The four pills a day I am taking are not doing the trick.  I was so relieved that he knew what was wrong with me.

For the next four days I take 8 magnesium pills a day...that should cure me!  At the end of those 4 days I go back to 4 pills a day.  If I need to I can take up to 6 a day after that.

I think it's going to work.  I slept a little last night, having taken 3 pills.  I think it's going to work.  I can't wait.

Preschool

Preschool is amazing this year.

I've only had 3 classes but I cannot believe the difference from last year.

I have 9 kids instead of 14.  I have all 4 year olds instead of 3, 4 and 5 year olds.

We've learned, laughed, played, completed science experiements...

Had calm center times.

Played with the parachute and petrie, the class duck...it's little and gray, it's stuffed!

The kids love petrie!

I've heard all about the tricker weasel that lives under the bed of one the students.  I've heard about best friends and family and adventures outside of the walls of preschool!

These kids listen really well.  Although they do like to make drum sounds on the table...one little girl just can't figure that one out, one little boy thinks they are too loud!

I'm exhausted when I get home after class, like Tuesday I couldn't move!

But it's fun!  It was fun last year also, just way more difficult to teach that many kids.  During worksheet time this year, though I here "Mrs. Melissa" every 5 seconds, I can way more easily go around the table to provide individual help!

It will be an adventure!  It already is!  And my favorite part is coming up...October and November where we talk a lot about pumpkins and apples and walk to Mrs. Melissa's garden to see how the corn and pumpkins, planted a wee late in the season, are growing!

Google ban...

Joel has banned me from google. 

Not all things google, just scary things google. 

Last Wednesday I failed the glucose screening test.  It's the initial screening for gestational diabetes.  For this test I had to go into the lab at the Big Sandy clinic, having fasted, drink some really sugary red hawaiian punch flavored drink in 5 minutes, then go back in an hour for a blood draw.  After each swallow of that stuff I kept thinking...why can't this be orange flavored, and don't throw up Melissa, this nice lab lady told me not to throw up!

They faxed my results to my doctor's office.

By 5pm that day I hadn't heard any results, so I assumed no news was good news.

Then at 5:15 Ronnie called..."2 things with your blood work today..." she said...

Ah bummer.  I fully expected all to be fine!  They were also checking my thyroid and iron levels that day and to be honest I'm not even sure what else.

First, she said my iron is too low so I need to start a supplement.  She gave me instructions for that then the glucose test...

My number was 164.  Their cutoff for being ok is 135.  Another test is in my future...

I was so certain I would pass that test that when I heard I had to do the 3 hr fasting one, with the same icky red stuff, I got sort of worried...no, really worried.

And that night, while Joel was in Havre leading confirmation, I googled gestational diabetes...

Bad idea!  Very bad!  I mean it told me some things I already knew, but it also told me some very very bad things.  It scared me.

Joel said no more google!  So, I've stayed away from it!

At our Monday appointment to check on the girls Ronnie will give me lab orders for the next test and I will schedule it with the Big Sandy lab for sometime next week.  It sounds awful, but I'm hoping that books, TV and some little walks will distract me from hunger of a long icky fast!

A text from a friend reassured me that people go through this all the time, and I can do anything for my little girls!  

Painting the nursery

Our friend Ellie visited last weekend!

What a blessing having her here was!  And Fun! 

Her and Joel painted the nursery, 4 walls, 2 colors, 2 coats of each color, all in about 5 hours. 

It looks pretty!  And I am so thankful for the help and for it being complete. 

We also took time for a town tour, bocci ball, WII games, 2 church services, the Mexican restaurant in Havre and catching up on our reality TV!

Thanks for coming Ellie!  And thank you for all of the help!

Now comes my part of cleaning the nursery and organizing baby things. 

It's overwhelming.  But, I'll figure it out!

Being lackadaisical...

We're having IVF twins after a long and painful 5 year journey through infertility...

I know you all know that already.

Thursday was our 26 week mark!  We've made it to 26 weeks.

And it still hasn't really sunk in...it still feels very surreal...and to be honest, we're feeling pretty lackadaisical about it.

I probably first learned that word, lackadaisical, in high school English class...for the first 3 years all we did was study, memorize and take tests on vocabulary!

That word sums up our feelings at the moment.  

We know we need to purchase so many more baby things in order to be ready and make list upon list of what those things are...

We know we need to be much more organized that we are...

We we know we need a plan for help once they are here and for paternity leave and for a sub at preschool and on and on...

And yes, we know we won't sleep once they are born and it will be so hard and terrible at times...

We're scared, nervous, joy filled...

And as I sit here, the nursery isn't any closer to getting finished...the baby clothes aren't any closer to being sorted and washed...the car seats are not any closer to being purchased...

But I can revel in feeling both little girls move...I can breath a little deeper at being one day closer to them growing big and strong enough to be born...I can be peaceful with my choice for nap taking and latte sipping...

It will all get done.  I promise.  Just not today!

Pumpkin lattes

On twitter  my name is "loveforlattes".

I love lattes. 

I also love Fall.  I am so ready for Fall.  I'm tired of 90 degree weather...I want to see leaves changing, pumpkins appearing, apples galore...I want to smell the scents of fall...

So, Saturday I broke out my homemade pumpkin latte recipe.  It's actually a recipe for pumpkin white chocolate hot chocolate...but add some coffee and you have the most delicious drink...

I love pumpkin flavored lattes.

Seriously, I knew the recipe was delicious but I had forgotten just how delicious.

I'm ready for Fall!

I regularly light my pumpkin scented candles.  I'm thinking of making white chicken chili for dinner.  I'm sipping a pumpkin latte.  I'm thinking of pumpkin recipes I can make...

Come on Fall, it's time to make your appearance!

A member of our congregation in Havre grows pumpkins.  Last year he gave us several pretty big ones.  He told me that he has 2 he is saving this year for our growing little girl pumpkins...I think that is so sweet!

I'm ready for Fall.  It's finally a little cooler here the past couple of days, thankfully.

Put me in Coach

Those of you who knew me in High School...remember my twin sister Jenn's routine to Put me in Coach for the talent portion of Junior Miss?

I often think of that when something big is coming up..

Today I am signing to myself, "Put me in Coach, I'm ready..."

Bring on the class of 2026!

Tomorrow is the first day of preschool with this class.

Yesterday I met them all, well almost all of them anyways, at an Open House.

I was ready well in advance but still slightly nervous.  Last year's open house for the class of 2025 was chaos...at it's purest form...kids everywhere, parents everywhere, toys covering the floor, little siblings screaming and running wild and one even climbed into the kitchen sink...

Fun, but chaotic.

I was expecting that again!  3:30 rolled around and I waited.  Who would come first?  When would they get there?

Then I heard voices and little feet...guess who the first person through the door was?

Remember the little lumber yard first aid boy from last year?  Yep!  He came to tell me all about his first 6 days of kindergarten.  He brought with him a little buddy or maybe a cousin, starting preschool tomorrow....he gave the little boy a tour, he told him the ins and outs of preschool!  It was awesome!  And a great start to the open house!

8 students and their parents attended yesterday.  I'm expecting 2 more to come tomorrow.  I think it's going to be a great year!

I'm ready.  

Camping

We finally went camping!

During seminary Joel went camping a couple of times with different friends, then we both went camping up North in MN with friends, and to a friends cabin in Wisconsin, we've camped at Lutherhaven and have stayed in cabins at camps...

But it's been a while...

Probably the most camping we've done over the past few years has been in a tent in our living room...staycationing...

But...

A couple of weekends ago.  We slept in a church member's camper.  Because lets face it, I was not about to sleep on the ground in a tent!

Church service the last Sunday in August was in the mountains at a rotary campground.  It included both of our churches and 2 others...

The campground was reserved the night before for anyone who wanted to camp out.

We were planning on skipping that part and just going out Sunday morning. But Friday night a parishioner called and invited us to go camping...we could sleep in their camper!

We made it out there about 3 hours later than we thought we would, but just in time for dinner. 

We enjoyed smores around the campfire, good conversation, a cozy sleep, some cool weather (finally!) and a wonderful church service the next day.

It's always fun to see Pastor Joel preaching and leading in a camp setting!