Pretending...

It is easier to pretend. Pretend we are pregnant. It is easier to pretend....easier than taking a test on Sunday that will either bring us tears of joy or tears of sorrow. We're scared. We're thinking about avoiding the test...then we can go on pretending. Then we don't have to feel anything more than what we are feeling right now. We're so positive this time, but so scared as the day draws near. We remember the pain of the last two times...and we wonder, why would this Sunday be any different than the last? We're really really scared. We know, without a doubt, that God will be there present with us when we take the test. But we have a little lack of trust in Him that He will make this happen for us. So, while we need Him, we're scared. We'll probably take the test Sunday night this time because we're going to Northern MN to visit a friend this weekend and hear him preach. Or we might wait til Monday because that gives us one more day for pretending. And when you pretend you can find a happy place, but along wit that comes a deep fear of it coming to a crashing halt. Here is our prayer, words from a song..."Oh Lord I beg of you, just this one thing..."