Our babies measured 7 weeks and 1 day. In 2 weeks, at the 9 week mark, we will have another ultra sound to check on them.
Dr. Shomento is lining this up for us in Great Falls. She wants to us to go to a perinatologist...a specialist for multiples and IVF pregnancies.
It's a relief that we don't have to make decisions like who to see on our own.
I'm waiting today to hear from the new doctor's office to schedule the ultra sound. Yet another thing to be excited about and nervous...ultra sound number 2.
Dr. Shomento said that at 20 or 22 weeks we will have a high tech very detailed ultra sound, something that seemed the same, but also sort of different than normal, since we are an IVF pregnancy with twins.
In the midst of thinking about another doctor and doctor's office I have high hopes for friendly and caring people. And I have comfort knowing that Dr. Shomento and Julia are only a phone call away.
On a side note...I've been having some pain in my uterus area off and on, ever since retrieval back in March...
I'll admit it had me worried at times. But guess what we also saw in the ultra sound Friday?
My left ovary is still giant...it is shooting out hormones like crazy at this point...it is the one that during retrieval was poked and prodded the most because it was most full of eggs...
No running for me yet. It's nothing to be worried about, it's just doing it's thing after a cycle of stimulation. But Dr. Shomento did say that if the other clinic says I have ovarian cancer when they see it to tell them that I DO NOT. Just call Dr. Shomento.
Monday, April 30, 2012
A friend...err doctor...for life!
It is time.
Time for us to be handed over to another doctor near by.
It's sort of sad. But it is time.
We waited for Dr. Shomento to come back into the room, after sharing our news with Julia, to help us "hatch a plan" as she called it.
We live 5 hours from her. As much as we want her to keep being our doctor, and she wants to be ours, it isn't safe for us to be that far away in the event of an emergency.
But have no fear! Dr. Shomento told me "you can call me for life"!
A friend...well actually a doctor...for life! Forever. She said to call her with any questions any time day or night. She said she has my number saved in her phone and anytime, please call.
Wow!
That's pretty cool. And so comforting.
I told her the picture of Her, Joel and Julia from transfer day was going on the nursery wall. She asked if once they are born we could take pictures of her and Julia with them...of course! That will also go on the nursery wall.
And when they are born, she will be on our list to call and text a picture to! Both her and Julia.
Time for us to be handed over to another doctor near by.
It's sort of sad. But it is time.
We waited for Dr. Shomento to come back into the room, after sharing our news with Julia, to help us "hatch a plan" as she called it.
We live 5 hours from her. As much as we want her to keep being our doctor, and she wants to be ours, it isn't safe for us to be that far away in the event of an emergency.
But have no fear! Dr. Shomento told me "you can call me for life"!
A friend...well actually a doctor...for life! Forever. She said to call her with any questions any time day or night. She said she has my number saved in her phone and anytime, please call.
Wow!
That's pretty cool. And so comforting.
I told her the picture of Her, Joel and Julia from transfer day was going on the nursery wall. She asked if once they are born we could take pictures of her and Julia with them...of course! That will also go on the nursery wall.
And when they are born, she will be on our list to call and text a picture to! Both her and Julia.
A miracle like thank you...
When the ultra sound was over and Dr. Shomento hugged me I told her THANK YOU for being our miracle maker...
She responded by saying that she just helped it along, we all know who was the real miracle maker is in this situation.
Awe. That God would use her and her team as tools to help create not one but two miracles, for us...leaves us in awe of our Creator Jesus.
Leaves us in amazement that we have a doctor who knows that she is an instrument in this process. She knows who the ultimate creator of life is.
What a miracle. What a miracle. Two miracles.
A team of people willing to to help create miracles. They give up so much time in their lives for us, for our babies.
They are a blessing. They work so hard to help give us the gift of life.
Words cannot even begin to express our gratitude for them and the kindness and love they have for us.
After we talked about miracles Dr. Shomento left the room to go tell Julia our good news!
She responded by saying that she just helped it along, we all know who was the real miracle maker is in this situation.
Awe. That God would use her and her team as tools to help create not one but two miracles, for us...leaves us in awe of our Creator Jesus.
Leaves us in amazement that we have a doctor who knows that she is an instrument in this process. She knows who the ultimate creator of life is.
What a miracle. What a miracle. Two miracles.
A team of people willing to to help create miracles. They give up so much time in their lives for us, for our babies.
They are a blessing. They work so hard to help give us the gift of life.
Words cannot even begin to express our gratitude for them and the kindness and love they have for us.
After we talked about miracles Dr. Shomento left the room to go tell Julia our good news!
Double miracles!
We were so nervous for last Friday!
We were sitting in the waiting room, me trying to focus on a magazine, Joel focusing on the one he was reading.
The door opened and my name was called...by a nurse I'm not even sure of her name, but I've seen her before.
I wanted to see Julia.
We were walking around to our room and we heard a "Hi Guys!"
It was Julia! We love her. She came right over to see how we were doing with progesterone, how I was feeling, and to sort through our box of meds with us (that's a story for another post). We were happy to see her.
The other lady took us into the ultra sound room once it was ready and we sat, nervously, waiting. Joel again was reading a magazine. I sat there staring at an infertility paper sitting on a table to my right.
Eek...nerves were so high!
In walked Dr. Shomento...
She said something like this: "Hi you guys, I don't know how you got an afternoon appointment, I have been waiting all day for this, I'm so nervous".
I thought, she's not supposed to be nervous! She then said something like: "ok, let's see if there are 1, 2 or 3 in there...well, your levels were not high enough for there to be 3"!
Joy flowed from this room at this point.
It was time...Joel stood at my head as she began the ultra sound...
"There's one".
"There's two"! As she turned the screen to us so we could see! I said "there's two?"
YES! Two babies. We could see their hearts beating. She told us everything we were looking at. She had the wand near baby A and told me to hold my breath...we heard it's heart beat! Then we moved on to baby B and heard it's heart beat.
Pure joy.
As soon as it was over Dr. Shomento hugged me.
We were sitting in the waiting room, me trying to focus on a magazine, Joel focusing on the one he was reading.
The door opened and my name was called...by a nurse I'm not even sure of her name, but I've seen her before.
I wanted to see Julia.
We were walking around to our room and we heard a "Hi Guys!"
It was Julia! We love her. She came right over to see how we were doing with progesterone, how I was feeling, and to sort through our box of meds with us (that's a story for another post). We were happy to see her.
The other lady took us into the ultra sound room once it was ready and we sat, nervously, waiting. Joel again was reading a magazine. I sat there staring at an infertility paper sitting on a table to my right.
Eek...nerves were so high!
In walked Dr. Shomento...
She said something like this: "Hi you guys, I don't know how you got an afternoon appointment, I have been waiting all day for this, I'm so nervous".
I thought, she's not supposed to be nervous! She then said something like: "ok, let's see if there are 1, 2 or 3 in there...well, your levels were not high enough for there to be 3"!
Joy flowed from this room at this point.
It was time...Joel stood at my head as she began the ultra sound...
"There's one".
"There's two"! As she turned the screen to us so we could see! I said "there's two?"
YES! Two babies. We could see their hearts beating. She told us everything we were looking at. She had the wand near baby A and told me to hold my breath...we heard it's heart beat! Then we moved on to baby B and heard it's heart beat.
Pure joy.
As soon as it was over Dr. Shomento hugged me.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Big day tomorrow...
And we're nervous, scared and excited.
I keep telling myself we shouldn't be scared. Then I remind myself it's probably normal.
We pray about our fear, we read scripture about our fear. Sometimes though, it's still there.
But tomorrow we will rise above it, with joy filled hearts...
We get to see Dr. Shomento and Julia again! We get to see our baby/babies.
We get to go to Bozeman! Costco! Target! A mall!
But most importantly of all, we get to find out how this pregnancy is coming along. We get to find out how many babies are being created, we get to bask in the awe of it all.
We have to leave at 5am to get Joel to a day long meeting he has in Bozeman...
Then at 1:15 we'll have our appointment! I'm sure there will be tears, the joyful kind!
I keep telling myself we shouldn't be scared. Then I remind myself it's probably normal.
We pray about our fear, we read scripture about our fear. Sometimes though, it's still there.
But tomorrow we will rise above it, with joy filled hearts...
We get to see Dr. Shomento and Julia again! We get to see our baby/babies.
We get to go to Bozeman! Costco! Target! A mall!
But most importantly of all, we get to find out how this pregnancy is coming along. We get to find out how many babies are being created, we get to bask in the awe of it all.
We have to leave at 5am to get Joel to a day long meeting he has in Bozeman...
Then at 1:15 we'll have our appointment! I'm sure there will be tears, the joyful kind!
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Gratefulness
I am so grateful.
In the midst of awe and joy...I am so grateful.
Daily I soak in it.
I sit on the deck, still in the midst of some disbelief, and I tear up...
I'm so grateful. God has give us this miracle.
As I reflect on our journey, and what the top of this blog says about how this miracle seemed, for so many years, unreachable...
I am so grateful.
A miracle is growing...I'm tired, I'm nauseous at times (though I have not gotten sick), I'm all of a sudden picky about what I eat (I mean I sort of was before, but now I eat what sounds good with some vegetables thrown in, and sometimes nothing sounds good...but pancakes recently!)...
I take naps when I can...
And through it all, I am so grateful. He chose us to bare this miracle! To be mommy and daddy...it still seems so surreal. I'll probably still be saying that when our children start Kindergarten!
We are grateful.
In the midst of awe and joy...I am so grateful.
Daily I soak in it.
I sit on the deck, still in the midst of some disbelief, and I tear up...
I'm so grateful. God has give us this miracle.
As I reflect on our journey, and what the top of this blog says about how this miracle seemed, for so many years, unreachable...
I am so grateful.
A miracle is growing...I'm tired, I'm nauseous at times (though I have not gotten sick), I'm all of a sudden picky about what I eat (I mean I sort of was before, but now I eat what sounds good with some vegetables thrown in, and sometimes nothing sounds good...but pancakes recently!)...
I take naps when I can...
And through it all, I am so grateful. He chose us to bare this miracle! To be mommy and daddy...it still seems so surreal. I'll probably still be saying that when our children start Kindergarten!
We are grateful.
Friday, April 20, 2012
The shot
We are still doing 1 shot a night. For the next several weeks.
Sometimes I don't feel like having a shot.
Sometimes we almost forget. Which is why I have an alarm on my cell phone to remind us. It goes off every night at 9pm.
Tonight was one of the nights we almost forgot. We tend to remember a few minutes before the alarm goes off then we listen to it as Joel is giving me the shot. We stop it from ringing, but we never turn it off. It must always be set.
It was the left sides turn for the shot tonight. It's usually the worst side...a couple of times it has hurt really bad. Which is another reason I dread it sometimes.
But tonight was different. Tonight was the most pain free this shot has ever been! Must have been because we needed a slight reprieve.
The nights that go smoothly always make us ask ourselves, "did we do it wrong?"...but Julia told me on the phone a few weeks ago that no, we cannot do it wrong! Whew!
Joel is a trooper, every night he sets the shot up, picks where to stick me, and then sticks. I had to do part of his job while he was at a conference last week, my grandma did the other part...
And though we both did our part very successfully...it was joyful for both of us to have Joel back!
Last night I dreaded it. Tonight it was just something we had to do.
You know what? Whether we dread it or not, we are so grateful we get to keep doing it. Every night. Every shot. Every bit is, well, amazing really. What is does to help our baby/babies grow, what it means getting to keep doing it...
In the end, we welcome it!
Sometimes I don't feel like having a shot.
Sometimes we almost forget. Which is why I have an alarm on my cell phone to remind us. It goes off every night at 9pm.
Tonight was one of the nights we almost forgot. We tend to remember a few minutes before the alarm goes off then we listen to it as Joel is giving me the shot. We stop it from ringing, but we never turn it off. It must always be set.
It was the left sides turn for the shot tonight. It's usually the worst side...a couple of times it has hurt really bad. Which is another reason I dread it sometimes.
But tonight was different. Tonight was the most pain free this shot has ever been! Must have been because we needed a slight reprieve.
The nights that go smoothly always make us ask ourselves, "did we do it wrong?"...but Julia told me on the phone a few weeks ago that no, we cannot do it wrong! Whew!
Joel is a trooper, every night he sets the shot up, picks where to stick me, and then sticks. I had to do part of his job while he was at a conference last week, my grandma did the other part...
And though we both did our part very successfully...it was joyful for both of us to have Joel back!
Last night I dreaded it. Tonight it was just something we had to do.
You know what? Whether we dread it or not, we are so grateful we get to keep doing it. Every night. Every shot. Every bit is, well, amazing really. What is does to help our baby/babies grow, what it means getting to keep doing it...
In the end, we welcome it!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
the other side of the glass wall
A long time ago I wrote about being behind a glass wall. I didn't know how to get to the other side. It was pain filled and tear filled. Day after day, month after month, year after year I was reminded of my broken heart, of our heart wrenched days of pain.
And now, in the midst of walking an IVF miracle, with a team of doctors who could not have been more amazing...
We're on the other side of the glass wall!
We made it. We're here. And we hardly know how to act.
One of the reasons I write is because I want the pain and the joy to be here, so I remember the pain and revel in the joy.
I know people still on the other side of that glass wall and I long for them to join us. I read my friends blogs filled with pain and anticipation as they wait and I shed tears for them.
Being on this side is the most surreal moment of our lives. We want to shout for joy from the mountain tops, or maybe we'll settle for our deck out back, it's closer!
We want to hide some of our joy, so as not to cause them more pain.
All around the world miracles are happening and people are waiting...for the joy to replace the sorrow, for the pain to turn to dancing...and I pray for them, for our Jesus to create miracles upon miracles...babies upon babies. I pray for grace to flow freely.
And now, in the midst of walking an IVF miracle, with a team of doctors who could not have been more amazing...
We're on the other side of the glass wall!
We made it. We're here. And we hardly know how to act.
One of the reasons I write is because I want the pain and the joy to be here, so I remember the pain and revel in the joy.
I know people still on the other side of that glass wall and I long for them to join us. I read my friends blogs filled with pain and anticipation as they wait and I shed tears for them.
Being on this side is the most surreal moment of our lives. We want to shout for joy from the mountain tops, or maybe we'll settle for our deck out back, it's closer!
We want to hide some of our joy, so as not to cause them more pain.
All around the world miracles are happening and people are waiting...for the joy to replace the sorrow, for the pain to turn to dancing...and I pray for them, for our Jesus to create miracles upon miracles...babies upon babies. I pray for grace to flow freely.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Sinking in...
It's still sinking in.
Joel and I have had almost no time together to bask in our miracle or miracles.
It's still sinking in.
With each day that passes it becomes a little more real. With each preschool session I teach I am reminded a little more...by how so very tired I am having to get up so early.
Joy, excitement, praise, anticipation.
Our baby, or babies (I'll keep including the plural since two were implanted, until we know for sure!) are 3/4 of an inch big right now...that's big compared to the poppy seed size they were!
I haven't been nauseous at all really, but I can't eat cereal in the morning or cooked carrots and sometimes only certain things sound good...I bask in it all...the tiredness, the headaches, the picky eating taste...
April 27th at 1:15pm with our doctor in Bozeman we have an ultra sound to check on our miracles and find out how many are in me growing! I hardly have the patience to wait for that day!
Joel and I have had almost no time together to bask in our miracle or miracles.
It's still sinking in.
With each day that passes it becomes a little more real. With each preschool session I teach I am reminded a little more...by how so very tired I am having to get up so early.
Joy, excitement, praise, anticipation.
Our baby, or babies (I'll keep including the plural since two were implanted, until we know for sure!) are 3/4 of an inch big right now...that's big compared to the poppy seed size they were!
I haven't been nauseous at all really, but I can't eat cereal in the morning or cooked carrots and sometimes only certain things sound good...I bask in it all...the tiredness, the headaches, the picky eating taste...
April 27th at 1:15pm with our doctor in Bozeman we have an ultra sound to check on our miracles and find out how many are in me growing! I hardly have the patience to wait for that day!
Louisiana, England, Australia, Jerusalem...
I follow and am followed by lots of "friends" on twitter from the above locations and other places around the world.
We all have one thing in common...a journey with infertility...and most of us have went through or are going through IVF.
My friend in Louisiana recently found out IVF worked for her also! There were tweets of congratulations going out to her and I.
So amazing...truly...I'm filled with hope for all of them.
I rejoice with those of us who received at BFP (Big Fat Positive in twitter world) and I cry tears of sadness with those who have recently received a BFN (Big Fat Negative).
I send "hugs" to them. I share with them. I listen to them.
I pray for the babies growing, and I pray for the babies yet to be on the way.
I pray for sweet Rose and her endeavor to try IVF yet again when that time comes, and I seek Jesus on her behalf, for miracles to abound.
I didn't know last summer when I joined twitter that I would find such a community. But oh how fun it is...to share, laugh, cry and understand the intense pain and the intense joy!
I follow and am followed by lots of "friends" on twitter from the above locations and other places around the world.
We all have one thing in common...a journey with infertility...and most of us have went through or are going through IVF.
My friend in Louisiana recently found out IVF worked for her also! There were tweets of congratulations going out to her and I.
So amazing...truly...I'm filled with hope for all of them.
I rejoice with those of us who received at BFP (Big Fat Positive in twitter world) and I cry tears of sadness with those who have recently received a BFN (Big Fat Negative).
I send "hugs" to them. I share with them. I listen to them.
I pray for the babies growing, and I pray for the babies yet to be on the way.
I pray for sweet Rose and her endeavor to try IVF yet again when that time comes, and I seek Jesus on her behalf, for miracles to abound.
I didn't know last summer when I joined twitter that I would find such a community. But oh how fun it is...to share, laugh, cry and understand the intense pain and the intense joy!
The done list
Living room curtains are hung.
Dresser that's been broken for years has been fixed.
Floors swept and mopped.
Basement organized, shelves filled.
Shelves in guest room closet upstairs are nearly empty.
Sitting on the porch in the sunshine eating taco salad, done.
3 shots without Joel, successful.
Many episodes of House Hunters, watched.
Fox News caught up on (that was Gramps, who was excited to discovered our second TV in the office!).
Windows washed.
Bathroom cleaned.
Laundry washed.
Living room vacuumed.
This is just part of the list of things Grandma and Grandpa accomplished while here. They left Sunday morning in the midst of a snow store. They arrived home safely Sunday night.
Grandma and I both breathed sighs of relief each night when a shot was done successfully! She was great! And so comforting to have her here and willing to give me the shots that would have been nearly impossible to give myself.
Family is such a blessing. And we are richly blessed.
Dresser that's been broken for years has been fixed.
Floors swept and mopped.
Basement organized, shelves filled.
Shelves in guest room closet upstairs are nearly empty.
Sitting on the porch in the sunshine eating taco salad, done.
3 shots without Joel, successful.
Many episodes of House Hunters, watched.
Fox News caught up on (that was Gramps, who was excited to discovered our second TV in the office!).
Windows washed.
Bathroom cleaned.
Laundry washed.
Living room vacuumed.
This is just part of the list of things Grandma and Grandpa accomplished while here. They left Sunday morning in the midst of a snow store. They arrived home safely Sunday night.
Grandma and I both breathed sighs of relief each night when a shot was done successfully! She was great! And so comforting to have her here and willing to give me the shots that would have been nearly impossible to give myself.
Family is such a blessing. And we are richly blessed.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Spring cleaning...
I've been pretty overwhelmed lately with the state of our house.
Lots of disorganization, lots of clutter. Lots of overwhelmingness.
And now we are bringing another person, or people, here to live, in about 9 months:)
Which increased the feeling of overwhelmingness...How is this all gonna get done?
Well, it seems sort of simple, we have many long months...but lots of things happen here last minute!
Which thinking about that style of getting things done, well, heightens the overwhelmingess!
Tuesday Joel left for a Pastor's Conference at Chico Hot Springs in Pray, Montana...
Grandparents to the rescue! We are still doing shots for the next 10 weeks, thankfully! A daily shot at night that I cannot give myself. I needed help. So, Monday night my grandparents arrived to give shots and help with this mess!
The basement is looking amazing, and that's only after a morning of cleaning, sorting, moving, emptying boxes, and cleaning.
We now have a guest room picked out downstairs, for when our current one upstairs becomes a nursery. We have the rec room downstairs almost ready for roller blading, if we roller bladed! Bring your roller blades, come visit:)! Year round roller blading in our basement!
I'm breathing deeply, soaking in the help, and the joy that comes with organizing.
Lots of disorganization, lots of clutter. Lots of overwhelmingness.
And now we are bringing another person, or people, here to live, in about 9 months:)
Which increased the feeling of overwhelmingness...How is this all gonna get done?
Well, it seems sort of simple, we have many long months...but lots of things happen here last minute!
Which thinking about that style of getting things done, well, heightens the overwhelmingess!
Tuesday Joel left for a Pastor's Conference at Chico Hot Springs in Pray, Montana...
Grandparents to the rescue! We are still doing shots for the next 10 weeks, thankfully! A daily shot at night that I cannot give myself. I needed help. So, Monday night my grandparents arrived to give shots and help with this mess!
The basement is looking amazing, and that's only after a morning of cleaning, sorting, moving, emptying boxes, and cleaning.
We now have a guest room picked out downstairs, for when our current one upstairs becomes a nursery. We have the rec room downstairs almost ready for roller blading, if we roller bladed! Bring your roller blades, come visit:)! Year round roller blading in our basement!
I'm breathing deeply, soaking in the help, and the joy that comes with organizing.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Embryos
Did I tell you the news?
Our 3 embryos, frozen, have arrived safely at Cryo-Cell International in Oldsmar, Florida!
Nestled in for siblings!
I think about them. I wonder who they are...will they be future boys or girls? Will they be safe having been frozen? What part of this journey are they? What will it be like when we decide it's time to do this again, have them unfrozen and implanted?
More miracles, waiting in the wings.
Nurse Melissa emailed me with the news that they were there. We had insurance on them, just in case.
Our 3 embryos, frozen, have arrived safely at Cryo-Cell International in Oldsmar, Florida!
Nestled in for siblings!
I think about them. I wonder who they are...will they be future boys or girls? Will they be safe having been frozen? What part of this journey are they? What will it be like when we decide it's time to do this again, have them unfrozen and implanted?
More miracles, waiting in the wings.
Nurse Melissa emailed me with the news that they were there. We had insurance on them, just in case.
A home test
I lost count of the number of home pregnancy test I've used over the years of this journey.
Every time they were negative. All 5 IUI's they were negative.
I began to be scared of them. I lost all trust in them. I called them bad names. I shed lots of tears over them.
Always negative.
Guess what? I still haven't done one this time, even though I know it would be a beautiful positive!
Julia and Dr. Shomento said I could cheat with one. I have one in the drawer.
But, I'll take the big fat very positive blood test news that we received last Thursday over a home test...any day.
I know it sounds weird...I know it's beyond silly.
I know I could take one now to have that memory.
But I am not going to. Why? My joy is complete.
Our miracle is growing.
Every time they were negative. All 5 IUI's they were negative.
I began to be scared of them. I lost all trust in them. I called them bad names. I shed lots of tears over them.
Always negative.
Guess what? I still haven't done one this time, even though I know it would be a beautiful positive!
Julia and Dr. Shomento said I could cheat with one. I have one in the drawer.
But, I'll take the big fat very positive blood test news that we received last Thursday over a home test...any day.
I know it sounds weird...I know it's beyond silly.
I know I could take one now to have that memory.
But I am not going to. Why? My joy is complete.
Our miracle is growing.
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Next
Remember the box of hope?
I opened it yesterday and looked inside. I left it in the basement though because our upstairs is such a mess, I didn't want to add to the clutter!
But it was, it is, beautiful. I brought the chocolate blue bunny upstairs and the brown bear Joel bought the night before our first IUI at Mayo.
I sit swimming in overwhelmingness. I sit pouring over pregnancy journals from my sweet sister Elizabeth, and babycenter.com that is going to send me updates about our baby (or babies, we did implant 2 embryos!), and the ELCA "my healthy baby" program site. I try to take it all in.
I dream, and I remind myself I can put the dreams into action...
I sit in awe. I offer praise and thanksgiving to our Jesus.
All these things are wrapped into this day and all the next days to come.
Monday we go back to Havre for more blood work to check the pregnancy hormone level and my thyroid level...Dr. Shomento said she will have to adjust my meds for that.
The end of the month, sometime, stay tuned, we will have an ultra sound in Bozeman. Then, depending on how many miracles we have, Dr. Shomento will set us up with a specialist in Great Falls. Or we can see someone in Havre if we end up not needing a specialist.
In the meantime, Dr. Shomento will send a happy note to our Mayo Dr.'s...friends of hers, letting them in on the miracle!
We celebrate Easter tomorrow, new life, new hope!
I opened it yesterday and looked inside. I left it in the basement though because our upstairs is such a mess, I didn't want to add to the clutter!
But it was, it is, beautiful. I brought the chocolate blue bunny upstairs and the brown bear Joel bought the night before our first IUI at Mayo.
I sit swimming in overwhelmingness. I sit pouring over pregnancy journals from my sweet sister Elizabeth, and babycenter.com that is going to send me updates about our baby (or babies, we did implant 2 embryos!), and the ELCA "my healthy baby" program site. I try to take it all in.
I dream, and I remind myself I can put the dreams into action...
I sit in awe. I offer praise and thanksgiving to our Jesus.
All these things are wrapped into this day and all the next days to come.
Monday we go back to Havre for more blood work to check the pregnancy hormone level and my thyroid level...Dr. Shomento said she will have to adjust my meds for that.
The end of the month, sometime, stay tuned, we will have an ultra sound in Bozeman. Then, depending on how many miracles we have, Dr. Shomento will set us up with a specialist in Great Falls. Or we can see someone in Havre if we end up not needing a specialist.
In the meantime, Dr. Shomento will send a happy note to our Mayo Dr.'s...friends of hers, letting them in on the miracle!
We celebrate Easter tomorrow, new life, new hope!
Praise & Thanksgiving
Shock & Awe...Easter Miracles...There are no words...
Those are all blog titles I thought about using for this post...I've been trying to form it all in to words...I'm still trying to believe it myself...
Our story is continuing with a miracle, maybe even miracles...
My phone rang Thursday morning right as I was walking 10 preschoolers downstairs at the church. I quickly turned them over to Pastor Joel and slipped into his office.
The caller ID said Dr. Shomento.
The moment was upon us...words cannot describe the emotion, excitement and fear all wrapped into one...
Dr. Shomento: Is this Miss Melissa?
Me: Yes
Dr. Shomento: Have you been cheating with home pregnancy tests?
Me: No, I've been too scared to
Dr. Shomento: She's been too scared to, well my dear, you are very pregnant
Me: I am? (as if she would lie to me!)
Dr. Shomento: Yes, your level needs to be at an 80 or higher to show you are pregnant, yours is at 217!
The 217 is where the "very" comes in.
Tears sprung forward and flowed. Shock and awe flooded me.
Dr. Shomento: Are you sitting down yet or still standing?
Me: I'm sitting now
She proceeded to give me instructions for next steps. She said, "I'm so happy I could be a part of your miracle."
And a miracle it is! The words she spoke are ones, that at times, we doubted we'd ever hear. And now, we bask in the joy, the awe, the amazing gift of life our Creator God, is giving to us.
I rushed downstairs, motioned to Joel to come into the next room. I told him IT WORKED! Our celebration included a quick hug, then back to the preschoolers.
Joel read to them about Easter and told them about how Easter means new life! I texted Mom, Jenn and Elizabeth to share our news! I was shaking. I had 30 minutes of preschool left. It was the longest of my life...I wanted them safely home, so we could bask!
Those are all blog titles I thought about using for this post...I've been trying to form it all in to words...I'm still trying to believe it myself...
Our story is continuing with a miracle, maybe even miracles...
My phone rang Thursday morning right as I was walking 10 preschoolers downstairs at the church. I quickly turned them over to Pastor Joel and slipped into his office.
The caller ID said Dr. Shomento.
The moment was upon us...words cannot describe the emotion, excitement and fear all wrapped into one...
Dr. Shomento: Is this Miss Melissa?
Me: Yes
Dr. Shomento: Have you been cheating with home pregnancy tests?
Me: No, I've been too scared to
Dr. Shomento: She's been too scared to, well my dear, you are very pregnant
Me: I am? (as if she would lie to me!)
Dr. Shomento: Yes, your level needs to be at an 80 or higher to show you are pregnant, yours is at 217!
The 217 is where the "very" comes in.
Tears sprung forward and flowed. Shock and awe flooded me.
Dr. Shomento: Are you sitting down yet or still standing?
Me: I'm sitting now
She proceeded to give me instructions for next steps. She said, "I'm so happy I could be a part of your miracle."
And a miracle it is! The words she spoke are ones, that at times, we doubted we'd ever hear. And now, we bask in the joy, the awe, the amazing gift of life our Creator God, is giving to us.
I rushed downstairs, motioned to Joel to come into the next room. I told him IT WORKED! Our celebration included a quick hug, then back to the preschoolers.
Joel read to them about Easter and told them about how Easter means new life! I texted Mom, Jenn and Elizabeth to share our news! I was shaking. I had 30 minutes of preschool left. It was the longest of my life...I wanted them safely home, so we could bask!
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
One more sleep
My preschoolers measure time in sleeps. I often hear, only 2 more sleeps until I get to go to a hotel with my cousins, or only 4 more sleeps before my grandma comes to visit...
I wasn't going to write this post.
I was, still am a little, scared to write it. But then I realized, of course I want to share this with you.
We only have 1 more sleep until pregnancy test day when we find out if all of this worked.
One more sleep.
That's not very much time. One might think we are going crazy wondering, and I suppose I am, but I'm also slightly scared...
Will not knowing keep the dream alive?
No, of course not. We need to know, whatever tomorrow brings. We want to know!
Tomorrow was supposed to be Friday but they moved it up a day because Dr. Shomento has to go out of town...
We will drive to Havre, have the test, they will fax the results to Dr. Shomento and either her or Julia will call us...probably right in the middle of teaching preschool, but Joel will be with me, and the kids can play.
I've cried a lot today...anticipation, saying goodbye to family who has been visiting, reading messages in all forms from family and friends.
On transfer day a friend sent this scripture to me: I John 1:9 "Perfect love drives out all fear."
God has that for us and for our babies. He's on our side. His grace is flowing, and I need it, in abundance.
I wasn't going to write this post.
I was, still am a little, scared to write it. But then I realized, of course I want to share this with you.
We only have 1 more sleep until pregnancy test day when we find out if all of this worked.
One more sleep.
That's not very much time. One might think we are going crazy wondering, and I suppose I am, but I'm also slightly scared...
Will not knowing keep the dream alive?
No, of course not. We need to know, whatever tomorrow brings. We want to know!
Tomorrow was supposed to be Friday but they moved it up a day because Dr. Shomento has to go out of town...
We will drive to Havre, have the test, they will fax the results to Dr. Shomento and either her or Julia will call us...probably right in the middle of teaching preschool, but Joel will be with me, and the kids can play.
I've cried a lot today...anticipation, saying goodbye to family who has been visiting, reading messages in all forms from family and friends.
On transfer day a friend sent this scripture to me: I John 1:9 "Perfect love drives out all fear."
God has that for us and for our babies. He's on our side. His grace is flowing, and I need it, in abundance.
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